Sunday, December 30, 2007

Kate's Christmas Message


The nation awoke with a definite buzz
On the thirtieth day of December,
Remarking “This will be a great day for us
And one that we’ll always remember.”
They texted each other in great jubilation,
Reminding their friends of the time and the station
Then tuned in, in scarce-controlled anticipation
To hear young Kate Lawless addressing the nation
In tones clear and bold
With r’s roundly rolled
With her masterly powers of oration.

A hush filled the air as she started to speak,
All eyes in the church were upon her.
They listened, intent on her pow’rful critique
Of the value of parental honour.
She told each recalcitrant sister and brudder
To reflect on respect and to learn how to smudder
Their hard-working father and long-suff’ring mudder
With love and support. And the crowd gave a shudder
And wiped away tears
That left blackened smears
And turned round and hugged one anudder.

And when she had finished, the country arose
And gave her a standing ovation.
Touched to the heart by such eloquent prose,
They called her the soul of the nation.
Then every Patricia and Pauline and Percy
From Rathlin to Rosslare, from Derry to Dursey,
From Fair Head to Farranfore and vicey-versey
Clasped hold of their mother, at pains to let her see
How sorry they were
That they had dissed her
And begged her forgiveness and mercy.

The words of a prophet hang long in the air,
Affecting each person that hears them.
And many who listened to Kate’s earnest prayer
Now honour the parent that rears them.
Psychologists ruminate ‘pon what befell them.
They all remain quiet, no need to compel them,
They’re so well-behaved that there’s no need to quell them
For myths just exist for great minds to dispel them
And the organs of state
Are grateful to Kate
For the message she opted to tell them.

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